This past week I have been having a very emotional time. It seems that I cant control my feelings. Yes I try to do my every day routine. I make my coffee and check my email. I pet the cats and give them treats. I talk to my online friends from around the world. I do my blog and read everybody else’s blogs.
The truth is, I wake up in the morning and my first thought is “dad? are you with us today?” I go make coffee, “dad? when was the last time you had a good cup of coffee?” I check my email. I pet the cats “dad loves cats too”. I talk to my friends, “wish I could talk to dad”. Then I sit here and think what to blog about…dad is all I have in my mind. So my posts are about him this week and will be this way till I am ready to move on.
I’m not sure how much more time it will take me to move on. I guess untill Dad finally is gone and I finish all my crying. I have lost people but never someone that means so very much to me. I cant compare this pain in my heart with any other pains I have ever felt before. I have felt my heart break many times in my life but this time, this crack, wont ever be mended.