Over the past 10 years, I haven’t made many friends. To be honest, I can count them all on one hand. When I left my life with Bob, I also gave up all the people I thought were friends. I did have many. Some were just party people and others came by weekly to hang out for an evening.
I did have a few girl friends that were close. One in particular I talked with and saw almost daily. She and I were very close for about 9 years. We were like sisters. The only time we weren’t together was when we slept. We went to our homes and in the morning we talked again. I would even go keep her company at work. And when she moved away, it wasn’t long and we moved closer.
When I left, I left her behind. It was a very hard thing to do. I really loved her like a sister. We were 2 of a kind. I miss her some days. Other days I don’t. There were a lot of hurt feelings. Some of those feeling of hurt are still there.
The friends I have now are close, but yet at a distance. I’m afraid to get close. I don’t want to get burned again. Yes, there is good reason to be cautious. It’s a long story and I will tell it some other time.
My friends I have now are good people. Most are online people. Since I spend a lot of time online. I meet people as I travel through the online world. Some stay and become friends and others move along after a few days. The ones that stay I chat with daily, even if it’s just to say HI.
The ones I know in the real world I talk with on the phone from time to time. I’m not much for phone chatting. I keep up on Facebook or Email.
But this is about friends. What are they? They are special. Some are good for a laugh and others will give you a shoulder to cry on. There are those that don’t really care either way as long as it’s about them. Some you can have coffee with and chat about the kids and the weather, but never talk about personal things. There are even family members that can be friends, sisters or brothers that you are so close with that you share every secret with them. Then there are the lucky few that you grow up with and stay best friends all your life. That is a rare friend.
I guess over these last 10 years that I have slowly made my life changes; I have found one friend that I will always keep close to my heart. Yes, it’s Gregg. He is my dearest friend that I will always have. Now, I don’t say this easily. It took him a long time to get this close to me. He knew the pain I went through when it comes to friends. Even after we married, I was still not willing to let him in completely. There is still times where I second guess myself. Wondering if letting him know all my secrets is a good idea.
But, I trust him to never use anything against me; so far I was right in my choice of trust. I have made a best friend in him.
So what is a true friend? Honestly? I think we all have true friends in our lives; we just need to look a bit deeper to see them. Sure, you might pick the wrong one and you could get hurt. But isn’t that part of life? We need to make those mistakes so that we can learn from them. Sometimes we make the mistakes again and again. We wonder if we will ever learn not to. It will hurt for a while. Then we do it again. Then it happens, that one person finally shows you what a really friend should be. That is the person you need to hang on to. Keep them close. You will be rewarded with a great friendship that can even outlast a life time.