Where Did This Year Go?

Wow, can you believe its already October? This year went by so fast. I spent most of it in bed sick. January, February and March I was so sick with my IC. The days went by and then months and the next time I looked outside it was spring. I had a couple months where I was feeling better and then August hit me hard again. I think I was in bed for about 3 weeks.

Now September is gone and we have 3 months left of this year. Time passes quickly when you aren’t looking. On the 18th it will be 3 years that I have been blogging. On the 27th I will be turning 42. I thought I just turned 40? lol. I hope that the rest of this year turns out better. How much can happen in 3 months? LOL  let’s hope for nothing.

I know that I haven’t blogged much this year, but I hope to change that soon. It’s hard to blog when there is nothing going on. I don’t want to be depressing and blog about my aches and pains every day. That just brings you down with me. I also don’t want you to feel sorry for me. I actually hate it when people pity me. It’s like people that have been through child abuse, you know the ones, they try to make you feel sorry and pity them for the pain they have been through and they use that pain as a crutch.  An excuse when something goes wrong.  I get angry at people like that.

I feel sorry for the child when it has happened but to carry it with you all your life and use it as an excuse saying “this is why I am like this” I’m sorry but you get no sympathy from me. You need to get over it and move on with your life. I know I sound cruel, but I guess I feel this way cause I have had things in my past that were traumatic to me and I still have to deal with the nightmares, but I don’t use it as an excuse or try to make people feel sorry for me.

I know that I am sick and I know that I will always be sick, so why try to make others feel my pain? It’s mine and I am dealing with it. I don’t use it as an excuse. When I say I can’t do something or can’t go somewhere there is a reason. I really can’t do it, my body won’t let me. So when I say no, don’t ask me why or push for a reason, just take the no and be happy.

Yeah I know, I’m babbling and you probably think I am talking to you, but I’m not. I’m just venting. I feel like I have wasted this year. I plan to do things and me being sick in bed for weeks on end makes those plans go out the window. Maybe next year will be better?

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